Columns - 2016
January 2016
Today I googled “days to celebrate in January, and got a website called “wizzley.com” These are only a few of the holidays they listed.
Celebrating January Holidays If you’re looking for an excuse to celebrate this January then you’ve come to the right place as I’ve compiled a great list of cool holidays for you to pay homage to – some you may be familiar with, but many you have probably not heard of before. 1st January - New Years Day Make New Years Resolutions. 3rd January - Festival of Sleep Day 5th January- National Bird Day is a great excuse to teach your children about the birds in your own backyard or even to make a bird feeder to see what birdlife you can attract. 9th January - National Clean Off Your Desk Day 11th January - International Thank You Day 16th January - Religious Freedom Day- there are so many different countries around the world where people do not have the right to follow their own religious beliefs. This is something many of us take for granted without really thinking about it. Do Something to honor your religious beliefs. 24th January - National Compliment Day - Don’t forget the opportunities you have this day. The website also lists other holidays for the other days of Jan, but they did not list two of my favorites, both of which are very important. Martin Luther King Day- (A National day of service)Look it up on the web. There are so many things to do. 1. Look on the web for Martin Luther King Day. Learn about the history of the day, and why it is now a National Day of Service. Do something with your grandchildren, even if you dont live close to one another. Take pictures and start a MLK or TuB’shevat photo album. TuB’shevat - the Jewish Arbor day. 1. Plant a tree in Israel in honor of your grandchildren, 2. plant parsley in your house to be used at your Passover Seder.3. Make a pledge to plant a tree in the early spring with your grandchildren.4. Take a nature walk (if it isnt too cold where you live.) LAST SUGGESTION on this issue. Sit down with your grandchildren, or skype with them. Choose a holiday of your liking, one for every month of the year. Decide what you can do together on that day to make your house, your community, your world, just a bit better. Put the dates in your calendar and do what you discussed on the phone when the holiday approaches. And do it each year! |
February 2016
I will be 75 years old this month, and I have a request.
I want to share my joy of being 75 years old, and having my health and the health of my family at this time. I want to share the possibility of helping the world to become a bit better place because we are all here. I want to share this significant moment in time with those I admire. I want to make a large collage of people helping people, animals, the environment, etc. THEREFORE, I ask each of you to do an act of kindness, a project, something- during the next few weeks. Send three things to me, 1. A picture or a 1-2 minute video of what you, you and your children, grandchildren or your friends are doing to make the world just a bit better. 2. Write a very short note explaining what you are doing, and why.Write a couple of sentences that will make other people want to help your organization. 3. VERY IMPORTANT: Write the name and address URL ADDRESS and phone no. of the organization you are helping. (if the project is for an organization) I will then put together a collage of the pictures, for a couple of programs where I am teaching, and for advertising grandparentsforsocialaction.org and I will advertise the organizations so that others can help them too. (I will make some donations too) 4. SEND IT TO [email protected] THANK YOU If I can get 75 pictures and projects, one representing each year of my life, that would be so so wonderful. |
March 2016
This year I celebrated my birthday at Bernie’s Book Bank. We had lunch there, and then everyone volunteered. Every birthday that we celebrate as we age can be an opportunity to help in a small way to do something to make the world a bit better. During this next year, I hope to feature places where you can go yourselves, and or take your family and/or friends to volunteer for a day. This place is a treasure!!!
Bernie's Book Bank facilitates the collection, processing and redistribution of new and gently used children's books to significantly increase BOOK OWNERSHIP among at-risk infants, toddlers and school-age children throughout Chicagoland. Thus far, they have distributed over 5 million books. They need volunteers to help to sort, pack, sticker, and send all the books out. |
April 2016
On April 10, I went to GOOD DEEDS DAY. What a fabulous event. Over 1100 people participated and did good deeds at 20 projects in the community.Projects included pet visits with the elderly, cooking and serving meals to those in need, playing games with special needs children and adults, and so much more.
In the morning, I accompanied a small group to the Chesed Fund. Chicago Chesed Fund helps those in the community through financial assistance and a warehouse of free groceries, household staples, used clothing, and furniture. They always need volunteers. If you would like to donate or to help out with your family, call at 847-679-7799. In the afternoon, I went to Bernard Weinger to help out with the projects. I could not begin to count the no. of people and the joy they all felt, and the help they all gave. I spoke to a 5 year old who was coloring a picture. “What is the for?” I asked. He said without hesitation that it was for children in the hospital. I asked some young children what they were doing with the plastic bags they were tying together. They knew they were going to be made into mats for the homeless or for people in shelters so that hopefully, no one would have to sleep on the ground. The workers were busy, and the staff was amazing. They made sure that each participant understood the importance of whatever project was on their agenda. There were collections, a blood drive, sessions for young people as well as for teens. Good Deeds Day was sponsored Through a breakthrough Grant to the Federation with the support and work of many different agencies, and coordinated through the dedicated work of Tov. About TOV: The Tikkun Olam Volunteer (TOV) Network is JUF's connection point for people who want to donate their time to help others in need. TOV places members of the Jewish community with Jewish United Fund/Jewish Federation affiliated agencies and with community service projects that need volunteers. Look on the website JUF.org/Tov to find places where your family might volunteer. And a massive thanks to all the Tov Staff and Volunteers for making this day possible in order to help thousands of people in the Chicago area. REMEMBER, IN REALITY EVERY DAY IS GOOD DEEDS DAY. TRY TO SHARE ONE GOOD DEED WITH YOUR GRANDCHILDREN EVERY DAY AND ASK THEM TO DO THE SAME. |
May 2016
Dear friends,
For the last two years, I have been lucky enough to work as the Director of the “Gifts” Program, a program designed to teach grandparents to inspire their grandchildren to be philanthropists and social action activists. We have developed a 5 week curriculum, have piloted it in approx 20 congregations, and have met with great success. Grandparents have told me their grandchildren are now philanthropists. They have said they have new-found relationships with their grandchildren. I have heard that people are engaging in more social action projects. They are thrilled that they participated in this program and have asked if we are going to do anything else next year. YES, we are sponsoring a symposium to be held at Beth Emet in Evanston. Note the breakout sessions for this symposium. They are designed to teach grandchildren and grandfriends of any age to put the “action” into social action. And the breakout sessions are being taught by amazing people. We hope you will attend and bring friends as well. This promises to be an enriching program. * The Symposium was on June 26, 2016. I look forward to seeing you next year! If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to call Sharon Morton- 847-477-2955, or email [email protected] |
June 2016
I just returned from the the trip of a lifetime. My family and I went to Normandy to see my grandson play the sousaphone with the Iowa State Band on June 6, in Normandy, commemorating D Day. The enormity of thinking about what our ancestors did to make this world a better place is so huge- that the allied forces could coordinate an effort to end Nazism- Canadians, Americans, British- all working together. Thousands of people descended on Normandy in this huge effort.
There are not words to describe my feelings as I remember the days and the people that made our world safe (at least for awhile) We met veterans who were there- who saw the horror of people being killed around them, who persevered for the freedom of this world. I share this personal moment with all of you because it is important to remember. George Santayana said “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” I share this moment of my life because it was shared with a grandchild. Sharing experiences with grandchildren last a lifetime- for sure!!!! And finally, I share this story to remind us all to think about sharing moments of courage, commitment and love as to instill these values in the hearts and minds of our grandchildren. |
July 2016
People ask me- How do I let my grandchildren know how important they are to me, how much I love them. There are many ways. I share just a few.
You can have these conversations in person, on the phone, by texting or email. Try to set a once a week conversation time with them so that they stay connected. Quick ideas to show your grandkids your love!
September 2016
We often wonder what we can do to help our grandchildren become philanthropists and social action activists. (one who gives money, time, and voice to a project that is important to him.) Depending on your time, your interests your family’s willingness, these are a few ideas about the KIND of social action you can do with your grandchildren.
WHAT KINDS OF SOCIAL ACTION PROGRAMS MIGHT WE UNDERTAKE TO DO? 1. It is the Bold program that captures the imagination- like buying an ambulance for Israel, starting recycling in your business neighborhood, building a house for Habitat. 2. It is the simple program that doesn’t take a lot of time - like packing sandwiches or bringing in clothes for the poor. 3. It is the program that begins because of a commitment and then grows and takes on a like of its own, like a visit to a nursing home to hear immigrant stories and then continues because of a friendship. 4. it is the program that comes about because of a sense of outrage. It is the story of a 12-year-old who saw pictures of children working for a dollar a day and was reminded of the sweatshops in America and set a very large program in action to end child labor. 5. it is the program developed by a group of people who see the ‘big picture’. 6. It is a program that is fun, challenging, and very significant and spearheaded by one visionary. It is like the story of Ariana Handelman building a playground with an organization called Kaboom, in honor of her bat mitzvah. 7. It is a program that is incidental to other programs. As people assemble for birthday party, dinner, etc. they can easily sign a postcard or donate five dollars for a cause that is important to you and your family. 8. It is the program that we do with our friends, our family and /or with our grandchildren. Like trips to Washington to Congress, social action newsletters, hearing speakers, filling out surveys, participating in social action programs, participating in family discussions in regard to social action. ……. How do we know when we’re successful? Take pictures of the projects, write stories about your feelings about your work. Then discuss the question with your grandchildren. and do it again or find a new project to do. Good luck to you all, on whatever you do, and let me know what you have done. We would love to feature your family. 
November 2016
Earlier this month, I read an article on happiness. It spoke about happiness as an attitude of life. I asked why some people always complain about the "small stuff” in their lives, while others seem to have serious problems and still see beauty in the world. My mother died of cancer slowly and painfully, yet every day of her life she would look out the window and say, "Isn't this the most beautiful day that God ever made?" I then began looking for quotes on happiness and found many. These are just a few of them on which to reflect.
“Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give.” - Eleanor Roosevelt “Joy can be real only if people look upon their life as a service, and have a definite object in life outside themselves and their personal happiness.” - Leo Tolstoy “The greatest degree of inner tranquility comes from the development of love and compassion. The more we care for the happiness of others, the greater is our own sense of well-being. -Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama “Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.”- Groucho Marx “Knowledge of what is possible is the beginning of happiness.”- George Santayana I’ve discovered the secret of happiness is Learning how to glide I’ve discovered the secret of happiness is Just enjoy the ride Don’t let the journey be tainted by pride... I’ve discovered the secret of happiness is Not to mourn the past I’ve discovered the secret of happiness is Not to run too fast You can still beat them by coming in last ‘cause the secret The secret of happiness is… I’ve discovered the secret of happiness is Not to be afraid I’ve discovered the secret of happiness is All illusions fade Don’t fear the future you’ll just be delayed ‘cause The secret The secret of happiness is… Living in the now Livening in the times it takes to blink I think is how!!!! “Secret of Happiness” from the musical Daddy Long Legs. Music and lyrics by Paul Gordon, book by John Caird. Based on the novel by Jean Webster We are living in a stressful time now—but we must always remember to be happy with SOMETHING— and to be GOOD. And shortly, Thanksgiving will be here, so let’s remember on that day to be sure to express our gratitude for SOMETHING in our lives. |
August 2016
I take each grandchild on a trip to commemorate their tenth birthday. During the time we are away, we spend one day doing something good for the country or place where we are. In Mexico, we (along with several others,) saved 6 tiny baby sea turtles who were not strong enough to get out of their nest and get to the sea.
This was the last 10 year old trip of my life, as the last of my grandchildren is now ten. There is a saying in our tradition, “the last is the most precious” because it marks a moment that can Never be repeated again in any way. I have learned so much from each of my grandchildren as they were approaching their teen years, and we were in a week long setting- just the two of us. SO—I want to suggest a significant thought that I learned from my granddaughter. Journaling!!!!!!! My granddaughter journals every night-just briefly. She does it in 3 sections. 1. The GLOW- (the nice thing that happened during the day- the thing that happened for which she feels gratitude, the thing that she did that was helpful to another person..) 2. The hero- the person she will remember from the day, and why). The downside- (The thing about the day that was sad, or difficult for her). Every night, she would write in her journal and then read it to me. I hope I will now start to keep a journal of my own. I hope that periodically, she and I can get together to read our journals to one another. I hope that each of you and your grandchildren will start writing a journal- short, sweet, regularly, and I hope we find ways together to review parts of them. Then there was the story I heard on the trip of when my granddaughter found God, and prayer in her life—but that, as they say in stories, is another story for another day! 
October 2016
During September, I went to dinner in a gym at a church with Jews, Christians and Muslims. Each of us brought a dinner dish from our own tradition, and the food was truly a feast of cultures. We all sat at table with people of the three faiths, all people who are willing to help one another to make this world a better place. It wasn't fancy. When the 150 or more people all got up to get dinner, everyone stood in line talking to one another, and it WAS beautiful, and it was warm. And there was laughter, and there was concern for the world that was palpable. The people who spoke after dinner included a Rabbi, a Priest, an Imam, a Holocaust survivor. The speakers included young teens, and elders of all three communities. And when we left, everyone embraced and felt that perhaps there is HOPE for the world. There was certainly love.
The group is called "Children of Abraham Coalition". Consider learning about them and perhaps joining. Included is just a small clip of two young men talking about why they joined. Check it Out HERE 
December 2016
This week, my daughter and I went to “Newlifeforoldbags” an organization made up completely of volunteers. They are located in the city of Chicago, and would love to locate in the northern suburbs, as well. They have made over 3200 sleeping mats for the homeless. As we spoke to people there, they told us that some people come to crochet the sleepng mats. Some come to eat the snacks (all supplied by the volunteers) and drink the coffee and chat, others make the plastic yarn from which the mats are made (plarn) Still others make other things using this plastic yarn which is made from used plastic grocery bags. The bags are given to shelters, and they give them out to the homeless. The woman I spoke to said she has been volunteering there once a month for 6 years. It is awesome and inspiring to see what is happening there. In the next week, I am working with a couple of congregations to teach them how to make the plarn and perhaps how to make the sleeping bags. What an awesome project this is, and how wonderfully it can help the homeless.
Click HERE to learn more. |
October 2019
Leaving a legacy is so important - It can be in writing, in living, in loving— It can come from your talent, your time, or your treasure (not just money)
LEAVING A LEGACY
Cus D’Amato was a famous boxing manager and trainer. He once said that a “hero and a coward both feel the same thing. It’s what they do that makes the difference. It’s what the hero does that makes him a hero and what a coward doesn’t do that makes him a coward.” What we feel is not going to leave a legacy, what we do or don’t do will.
What do you want people to say about you when you’re gone? What story is your life writing that will be left for generations to come? These are deep questions to ponder about what kind of legacy your life will leave. Here are 10 ways on how to leave a legacy.
1. Live your legacy.
Our children listen to us most intently by watching us live. So live with character, conviction, and passion. The most indelible legacy is the way that we live.
2. Live like you mean it.
Engage this life with passion and gratitude. None of us know how long our lives may be. But we can leave the legacy of living like we care, and living in a way that honors our creation. People will remember how you live more than the details of your achievements.
“Loving our spouse and our children with commitment and enthusiasm is a legacy like no other.”
3. Love like your life depended on it (it does).
Even when we have nothing else to give, we still have love. Loving our spouse and our children with commitment and enthusiasm is a legacy like no other.
4. Keep a journal.
Not a writer? No problem. Just develop the habit of keeping a regular record of what’s important in your life. One All Pro Dad we know simply kept notes in the front of his Bible. Jot down key events like births, weddings, and signal achievements, along with a comment or two. When he passed away, it turned out to be priceless.
5. Share the family stories with your children.
Be an open book. Share your stories. Believe us when we say the kids prefer these even to Harry Potter, and the telling can become a conversation they value well into adulthood.
6. Be honest.
Nothing communicates like authenticity. Share your failings as well as your triumphs. A legacy that speaks of transparency and an open spirit is a legacy that will benefit many generations.
7. Ground your purpose in a greater purpose.
We each live a story. The best stories are grounded in principles and purposes that are timeless, and certainly bigger than we are. Live a story that lasts an eternity.
8. Give your family the gift of time.
Most children and grandchildren remember presence more than they remember presents. Commit enough of yourself that your legacy is the fact that you loved enough to be there.
9. Live for others.
The great legacies of history are people who dedicated their lives to the service to humanity. On a smaller scale (but no less important) is our service to those we love, to our family, friends, and community.
10. Talk about your vision after you have departed from this life.
Share with your kids what kind of lives you would like them to live, even after you have died. Having those thoughts constantly play through your children’s heads can help navigate them as they face crucial choices. “What would Dad do?” is the most powerful legacy of all.
LEAVING A LEGACY
Cus D’Amato was a famous boxing manager and trainer. He once said that a “hero and a coward both feel the same thing. It’s what they do that makes the difference. It’s what the hero does that makes him a hero and what a coward doesn’t do that makes him a coward.” What we feel is not going to leave a legacy, what we do or don’t do will.
What do you want people to say about you when you’re gone? What story is your life writing that will be left for generations to come? These are deep questions to ponder about what kind of legacy your life will leave. Here are 10 ways on how to leave a legacy.
1. Live your legacy.
Our children listen to us most intently by watching us live. So live with character, conviction, and passion. The most indelible legacy is the way that we live.
2. Live like you mean it.
Engage this life with passion and gratitude. None of us know how long our lives may be. But we can leave the legacy of living like we care, and living in a way that honors our creation. People will remember how you live more than the details of your achievements.
“Loving our spouse and our children with commitment and enthusiasm is a legacy like no other.”
3. Love like your life depended on it (it does).
Even when we have nothing else to give, we still have love. Loving our spouse and our children with commitment and enthusiasm is a legacy like no other.
4. Keep a journal.
Not a writer? No problem. Just develop the habit of keeping a regular record of what’s important in your life. One All Pro Dad we know simply kept notes in the front of his Bible. Jot down key events like births, weddings, and signal achievements, along with a comment or two. When he passed away, it turned out to be priceless.
5. Share the family stories with your children.
Be an open book. Share your stories. Believe us when we say the kids prefer these even to Harry Potter, and the telling can become a conversation they value well into adulthood.
6. Be honest.
Nothing communicates like authenticity. Share your failings as well as your triumphs. A legacy that speaks of transparency and an open spirit is a legacy that will benefit many generations.
7. Ground your purpose in a greater purpose.
We each live a story. The best stories are grounded in principles and purposes that are timeless, and certainly bigger than we are. Live a story that lasts an eternity.
8. Give your family the gift of time.
Most children and grandchildren remember presence more than they remember presents. Commit enough of yourself that your legacy is the fact that you loved enough to be there.
9. Live for others.
The great legacies of history are people who dedicated their lives to the service to humanity. On a smaller scale (but no less important) is our service to those we love, to our family, friends, and community.
10. Talk about your vision after you have departed from this life.
Share with your kids what kind of lives you would like them to live, even after you have died. Having those thoughts constantly play through your children’s heads can help navigate them as they face crucial choices. “What would Dad do?” is the most powerful legacy of all.
December 2019
As we prepare for Chanukah, think of joy, of celebration, and learn about what we can do to make the world better.
Go to the website RAC.ORG/CHANUKAH. The site will suggest that you go to a different social action site each nite, and will list possibilities for you.
Also, if you are in the habit of buying Chanukah gifts for your grandchildren - think about taking your grandchildren shopping for a gift for them AND a gift that they can donate to a shelter. OR buy them books that are classics that they will save for many years. Nursery Rhymes for younger children- Oh the places you will go for the older children.
Get them started on a book series that they will love. Check with a librarian to know which series are great for young readers.
Remember the wonderful books of our childhood- “The Bobsey Twins, or Nancy Drew, or the Hardy Boys. Not only will they enjoy the books, but they might become really good readers.
You can also find the site "personalitzed story books” They have lots of interesting books, and iseeme.com has a book that is about changing the world with your grandchild’s name in the book. Parents have told me that they wish that grandparents did not always buy the products that need lots of batteries that have to be replaced, so think about the things you loved as a child or as a parent. Perhaps stacking blocks for the young children-perhaps an adventure with you for the older children-perhaps a journal or diary, so they will write their own stories, or dreams.
And last, think about sending notes in the mail- (not just email) for each nite of Chanukah - They can be short stories about you, about your wishes for them, about anything you enjoy about them.
They will love getting the mail.
And if you light candles, then choose a theme for each night-Hope-Joy-Memories-Values-Friendships-Peace-Responsibiltiy-or anything you would like to discuss around your table. And I pray that you all have a happy Chanukah or Christmas, and that you have a fulfilling year ahead.
Bubba Sharon
Go to the website RAC.ORG/CHANUKAH. The site will suggest that you go to a different social action site each nite, and will list possibilities for you.
Also, if you are in the habit of buying Chanukah gifts for your grandchildren - think about taking your grandchildren shopping for a gift for them AND a gift that they can donate to a shelter. OR buy them books that are classics that they will save for many years. Nursery Rhymes for younger children- Oh the places you will go for the older children.
Get them started on a book series that they will love. Check with a librarian to know which series are great for young readers.
Remember the wonderful books of our childhood- “The Bobsey Twins, or Nancy Drew, or the Hardy Boys. Not only will they enjoy the books, but they might become really good readers.
You can also find the site "personalitzed story books” They have lots of interesting books, and iseeme.com has a book that is about changing the world with your grandchild’s name in the book. Parents have told me that they wish that grandparents did not always buy the products that need lots of batteries that have to be replaced, so think about the things you loved as a child or as a parent. Perhaps stacking blocks for the young children-perhaps an adventure with you for the older children-perhaps a journal or diary, so they will write their own stories, or dreams.
And last, think about sending notes in the mail- (not just email) for each nite of Chanukah - They can be short stories about you, about your wishes for them, about anything you enjoy about them.
They will love getting the mail.
And if you light candles, then choose a theme for each night-Hope-Joy-Memories-Values-Friendships-Peace-Responsibiltiy-or anything you would like to discuss around your table. And I pray that you all have a happy Chanukah or Christmas, and that you have a fulfilling year ahead.
Bubba Sharon
February 2020
Grandparenting grandchildren who are being raised as Christians -- or Jewish -- or with no religion at all -- from a Bubbe who has been a Jewish Professional for the last 50 years.
I must start with a quote from Michael J. Fox: “My happiness grows in direct proportion to my acceptance, and in inverse proportion to my expectations.”
We learn from this that we must always see the awe and the wonder and the magnificence of our grandchildren -- and not try to change them. We want to leave a goodly legacy that will sustain them in difficult times, that will help them to learn face the good and the difficult times in their own lives, to appreciate themselves and to respect all peoples, and, finally, to know that their place in this world is VERY important, that each and every person can have a share in making the world better. What are the values we want to impart to them? What are the stories we want to share? What do we want them to grow up to do--to be? and how do we do it?
I must start with a quote from Michael J. Fox: “My happiness grows in direct proportion to my acceptance, and in inverse proportion to my expectations.”
We learn from this that we must always see the awe and the wonder and the magnificence of our grandchildren -- and not try to change them. We want to leave a goodly legacy that will sustain them in difficult times, that will help them to learn face the good and the difficult times in their own lives, to appreciate themselves and to respect all peoples, and, finally, to know that their place in this world is VERY important, that each and every person can have a share in making the world better. What are the values we want to impart to them? What are the stories we want to share? What do we want them to grow up to do--to be? and how do we do it?
- Tell stories - What were the 10 things that happened in your life that transformed you? What is the lesson you learned from each of them? What is your dream for your grandchildren based on those transformational stories. Help them to tell their stories, and discover what are the lessons they are learning from them.
- Teach them to be philanthropists - A philanthropist gives money, service and voice to the things that are important. One doesn’t have to be wealthy to be a philanthropist, he just has to know it is his place to give. (I started a philanthropy fund for each of my five grandchildren- $100 a year for each one. They can use that money to help causes that are important to them.) They also have certificates and occasionally, they get a philanthropy gift.
- Talk about and do Social action - Sometimes I take them to help me to help another person. Sometimes, they tell me inspirational stories of people who have done amazing things. There was 5 year old Phoebe, who collected over $3,000 for medical equipment for Ronald Mc Donald House. There was a 6 year project started by Alec when he was in the hospital and wanted a book, but could not get one because others might have been contagious. Now Alec and his grandmother, who lives in another state, have been responsible for collecting over 23,000 books. There is a group of children, ages 8-11, who have decided they no longer want presents, but instead they choose a cause and their friends donate when they come to the party- and perhaps at the party, they make gifts that go along with the donation. And there is a grandparent in Phoenix, who donates 80-100 boxes of school supplies and gifts every year (with her grandchildren who help to put them together) to infant welfare. Remember, you are always teaching them VALUES.
- AND BE HAPPY - Accept the lives of your children and grandchildren. Encourage them every step of the way. Take pictures of the goodness that they do, and put them in a Mitzvah photo album. Say a blessing when you see them doing kind actions. Write the blessings down together with them. and just keep loving them. It is the unconditional love between a grandparent and grandchild that makes this relationship so very special.
March 2020
We just celebrated Purim - a Jewish holiday that is very important to so many people. And we are told that when the world is finally at peace, we will only celebrate the holiday of Purim because it reminds us that we must always guard our freedoms because the world can turn upside down at any moment. 1. We are commanded to read the story 2. We are commanded to give tzedakah and to give gifts to the poor. 3. We are commanded to be happy - to eat and drink and enjoy our freedoms 4. We are commanded to give gifts of food to friends. I lived in Israel in 1989-90. I studied at Hebrew University. I lived a wonderful life - going to lectures, studying with new and old friends, celebrating Shabbat with friends every single week, being aware of the people, places, and times because I always knew that the year I spent in Israel was precious and it would end in a short time. And every Friday before Shabbat, I would write a letter home to my family telling them of my adventures. I missed them terribly during that year. (I guess it is like a snapshot of our lives - Each day is precious and we know that we are here on earth for a relatively short time, so we must cherish the people, the places, and the times in our lives.And we need to try to reach out to those we love, but don't see often because our lives are so busy). On Purim in Israel, I opened the door to my apt, and the hall in front of the door was filled with little gifts from my Israeli friends- of food, and a bit of tzedakah that I was supposed to pass on to the poor. It was just beautiful. When I came home, I shared the joy of that morning with my dear friend, Nancy. She told me she thought it was a beautiful tradition. Ever since 1990, that dear friend leaves some hamantaschen for me, and every year, I am near tears thinking of the joy I feel from her treat, of the wonderful times I had living in Israel, and every year, it is a reminder to me to reach out to those whom I love, and to those who need sustenance. Nancy has been doing this now for 29 years, and I am awed and amazed and astounded by her every single year by the continuation of a tradition that brings me such joy and such times of contemplation. Thank you my dear dear friend, and happy Purim to all of you!!! 
May 2020
IDEAS FOR LONG DISTANCE GRANDPARENTS
GRANDPARENTSFORSOCIALACTION.ORG (AND ALL GRANDPARENTS) Copyright grandparentsforsocialaction.org. Sharon Morton [email protected] These ideas are especially important at this time of Covid 19 because we can’t be with our grandchildren. 1. Tell them the story of the Rock in the Road. One day there was a avalanche of rocks that fell in the valley below. One of the big rocks fell in the road. One mad was walking by, and tripped on the rock and bumped his elbow. He got so mad, he kicked the rock and said some bad words and then walked away. Next, a woman came along the road, and she tripped on the rock on hurt her knee. She started to cry about how terrible in was that the rock was in the road and then she hobbled away. About an hour later, a little girl tripped on the rock. She turned around and said to herself. that rock is in a place that is dangerous for people. And she went back to to the rock, and she pushed and pushed and pushed until the rock wasn’t there to hurt anyone any more. 2. Discuss with them that there are many rocks (problems) in our lives. Which ones do we want to learn about and help others to make a difference in this world especially now at this time in our lives. Share your stories about making the world better, about what you learned from your own grandparents. Listen deeply to your grandchildren’s stories and write them down. Share a gratitude journal on the web to which you can each contribute. Establish a time each week to call your grandchildren. When you call, ask to speak with each grandchild, or one for each call. • Talk less, and be a non-judgmental friend. Listen, listen, listen, and ask lots of questions about what you hear. • And be sure to Support your adult children in honoring their values and choices. And one other idea at this time Here is an idea that take advantage of the story cited above, for long-distance grandparents to use to keep a strong attachment over distance: 1.Convene a family conference with children and grandchildren on the phone or in “zoom”. 2. Suggest that you would like to donate some money to a cause that would help people at this time.( If you have established a philanthropy fund for them, they can use that money too.) 3. Discuss what are the most important things to do NOW to help people in need. 4. Have them vote on which organization or group or individual they want to help. 5. After the money is donated, send them a note thanking them for caring, or think about sending each grandchild a book showing a child doing an act of kindness. OR buy them some chalk so they can write thank you on their sidewalk to mail people OR think of another thing you can do to help them continue to think of ways to help. OR perhaps the children can make a video like the one below and send it to you. AND perhaps schedule another phone call to continue the conversation. 
July 2020
As most of you know, I have 6 grandchildren, now ranging in age from 14-25. They all lived close to me when they were younger. Now I have one in Wisconsin, 2 in Boise, and the rest still in Chicago. In days gone by, they very often came to my house for Shabbat dinner which included lighting candles, saying blessings, and eating a meal together. I have missed that since the older children went away to college. However, after listening to the Grinspoon webinar last week, I decided I hope I don’t need to abandon the idea of Shabbat with my grandchildren.
As soon as I finish writing this newsletter, I will email my grandchildren and hopefully set up a weekly call for 20-30 minutes on Friday so we can discuss our favorite part of the week and/or a problem of the week, and then we can light candles together and say the blessing over the wine and the challah. When I was a little girl, Friday nite was my favorite time. It was the only nite my father was sure to be home because he worked so hard and so long. And we had wonderful discussions and he always gave us a “Friday Nite Surprise.” One week, he brought a beautiful stone for my brother and me, and he said he was thinking about us on his way home, and he found these beautiful stones for us. (As an adult, I had a stone collection for many years, and as my grandchildren were younger, they could bring me a stone, and then take one they loved for their collection. I wonder if any of them have a stone collection today. I will let you know if it works and if I will be able to celebrate Shabbat with my grandchildren again. 
September 2020
Connecting to Your Grandchildren During the Corona Virus and Afterwards
I couldn’t see my grandchildren these last months - so I decided I would try to connect with them by lighting Shabbat Candles together with them. My grandchildren range in age from 14-25, and one of them lives in Idaho with his wife. The others are all in the Chicago area. I sent out a note suggesting that everyone have a challah, 2 candles, a kiddish cup and wine or juice. Then one of my grandchildren said he would set up a zoom call at 6 p.m. for each Friday for a 45 minute meeting. Each week, one of us asks a question to the others. Where would we all like to travel together when this is all over? What are you doing to help your community during this time? What gives you comfort at this time? What has given you satisfaction at this time? Then we light the candles together, and say the blessings over the wine and the challah, and sometimes I tell a little story about my childhood. I have been so gratified that my grandchildren all want to continue to be a part of this every week. One other different story about connecting. A friend of mine lives in Chicago. Her very young grandchild lived in California. Every nite, my friend read a story to her grandchild at bedtime through Zoom. They did not actually see one another for many months, but when they did, the grandchild knew and loved her grandma immediately. The connection was invaluable. 
November 2020
I went to vote late in October. When I walked into my polling place, the local township office, I was so moved that there were people who were helping at the polls, that one trustee of the community was outside the polling place giving all of us coffee while we waited for our turn, and that all of us were willing to wait to cast our vote. And I loved seeing a few people who came with their young children (wearing masks of course) to accompany them while voting.
I was so happy to take the sticker that said, “I voted today.” I will discuss the importance of our votes to all my grandchildren. While there, I took a flyer that said "the need is local." And I thought, I can help my local community too. I called my grandchildren, and asked what can we each collect in our homes to give to people in need. They promised to collect something and I will pick it up to donate it to a local shelter. I also decided I would check out my house. I had ten coats from many years of wearing coats, and will give a few of them (all in perfect condition) to the shelter. I also had sweaters, scarves, hats, and slacks and shirts. I actually had 8 pairs of black slacks. I cant imagine why. And I had many toothbrushes and tooth paste still in their wrappers. (I dont know why) that I can give away. And as long as I am doing that, I will order extra food this week to include with the donation. It is so easy to do this - and I love that my grandchildren will be doing it too. |
April 2020
As grandparents, parents and children, residents of the US and the world, we know that letter writing is getting to be a lost art, and yet, it represents an a form of connection that is so important at this time. I wonder what you and/or your grandchildren would write to the Corona Virus? I would suggest that you ask them.
For younger children, they could dictate to you on the phone, and you can write down their messages. And you both might write to health care workers, to teachers, to Drs., to first responders, to people who are in nursing homes, to elderly people living alone in your neighborhood, to the people who work in your local stores, to your mailperson, to a friend that you haven’t seen for awhile, You would be doing a good deed, an act of kindness, and we need to find ways at this time of the Corona Virus, to let people know we appreciate them. that we care, and it would add some purpose to these days of isolation. This is part of a letter written by Dawn Foreman who was taking a three day long distance class at Harvard. The assignment was to write a letter to someone. I have both shortened her letter, and adapted it for purposes of this newsletter. What I like about it so much, is that she points out positive things that are happening even at this MOST difficult time in our history. Dear Corona Virus: You have disrupted schools, caused mass unemployment, put millions of health care workers in harm’s way, Because of you, grandparents cannot hold newborns. Weddings cannot take place. Students cannot wear a cap and gown and graduate. There are no first kisses at the prom, no handshakes to mark a new job, and no one praying together at temples, synagogues or churches. No one can eat a hot dog on the opening day at Yankee stadium.But for all that you have done, look what has happened as a result of this sad time in our world. Children are actually spending time with their families now. Healthcare workers--our heroes--are revered and praised. Teachers, traditionally at the bottom of the professional food chain in regard to paycheck and respect, are honored much more, as parents realize the Herculean job educating children can be. Innovative American companies are repurposing their factories to now make ventilators and n95 masks. Pet adoptions across the United States are up as much as ten-fold in the past few weeks and some animal shelters are now completely empty. Tens of thousands in New York cheer out their windows for essential workers nightly. A chorus line of teachers wave enthusiastically to a parade of cars filled with their eager students riding by. Grandchildren are serenading grandparents while standing outside nursing home windows, holding handmade I Love You posters. A 7-year old in Maryland used $600 of his own savings to make care packages for seniors and feed 90 students. When bad things happen, we can get strong, get smart, and unite. We can do something, a little something to brighten another person’s day, to donate to a cause that is important to us, to shop for someone, to write a note, to tell a story to do something to alleviate the loneliness, or to answer the needs of a neighbor or a friend or a stranger. Dawn Foreman finished her letter by saying, This crisis will be marked as a defining moment in world history--where we took a ‘time out’ to protect, heal and save our neighbors. As Malcolm X once said, “When ‘I’ is replaced by ‘we, even illness becomes wellness.” I pray that you all stay well, find new ways to communicate at this time, and find ways to feel fulfilled at this time. 
June 2020
I first met Gabe at a consulation on Conscience in Washington D.C. (from the Religious Action Center) when he was only ten years old. He was taking notes, talking to congresspeople, and I asked him where he learned to be such a social action activist. And what advice he had for grandparents to teach their grandchildren to be like him. This is what he told me then: Soon, the time will come for our parents and grandparents to "pass the torch" to the next generation of social action leaders in America, and we better be prepared. I'm talking about kids. When we arrive at the time when those who are now children become our nation's leaders, we must be sure that they have been prepared to get involved in social justice and politics. And getting kids prepared is very easy. When you attend a rally or a meeting of local leaders, take your grandchild along. When you go to a protest or go out to vote at your polling place, or in a caucus, take your grandchild along. If you are knocking on doors for a candidate or issue, it is just as simple as letting them come with you. If your grandchildren come for dinner or a visit, talk to them about different issues they can relate to. They will be much more interested than you think. If we don't do this now, the next generation will be empty of something that we so sorely need: social justice and those who are willing to step up and bring it upon us. The next decades will be very exciting ones in politics, and we will need leaders on both sides to make sure that the right things are happening. But this won't happen unless you do a very, very simple thing: just bring your grandchild along when you vote or campaign. Talk to them about issues. And soon, we will be sure that when the time comes, the next generation is willing and able to accept the torch with open arms and continue the work that everyone in the generations before us have started. Look at what he does now: Pretty amazing young man. What are we teaching our grandchildren about being socialaction advocates, and philanthropists today to be ready for when the torch is passed. Local High School Senior Gabe Fleisher Launches ‘Wake Up To Politics’ Podcast Gabe Fleisher is the host of "Wake Up To Politics," a new podcast from St. Louis Public Radio. DAVID KOVALUK | ST. LOUIS PUBLIC RADIOSince 2011, Gabe Fleisher has written a newsletter called “Wake Up To Politics.” Though newsletters are aplenty, what makes this one unique is that Fleisher — now a high school senior — started the newsletter when he was in third grade. Fleisher first came to St. Louis Public Radio’s attention in 2013, when his newsletter had nearly 600 subscribers. Today, “Wake Up To Politics” boasts more than 48,000 subscribers. And in partnership with St. Louis Public Radio, Fleisher has now launched a political podcast of the same name. 
August 2020
A good friend of mine recently had a first grandchild who lives out of town. I wanted to get a gift that was special so that she could help her grandchild to grow up to value herself, to share with others, and to have a great relationship with her out of town grandma. So these are the gifts I bought for them.
First, I bought 2 copies of the book “PAT the BUNNY, one copy for grandma to read to her out of town baby from the time the baby is perhaps 6 months old. Each page has a task for the baby to do. When the baby pats the bunny, the grandma says. "What a gentle child!”. When the baby plays peek-a-boo, grandma says, “What a playful baby” When the baby smells the flowers, Grandma can say. “Oh, you love nature.” When the baby looks in the mirror, grandma can say, “Oh, see the kind child.” When the baby feels daddy’s face, grandma can say, “You are such a loving child.” and both grandma and the baby on zoom will have the book in front of them. I once saw a 2 1/2 year old who was then reading the book to herself as she had been taught. The toddler turned each page, did the action and she said out loud, “I gentle—I playful—I love flowers —I kind—I loving— etc. I wish all parents and grandparents would read this book to the very very young children very often. It has lasting value results. I also bought the book," The little Engine that could” a great book to teach the child the theme, “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. And the last thing I bought was a bank from the company MOONJAR, It has 3 sections, save, spend, share. I believe the child can ge the bank at the age of 3 or 4. Once a child begins to have an allowance it can be put into this bank and the child hopefully will begin to understand that we have the privilege and the necessity, with our own money, to spend and to save. The child can also learn that he has the privilege and the responsibility to share with others. I hope all new grandparents think carefully about gifts they give to their grandchildren, not the electric expensive things, but things that will stimulate their imagination, that will help them in a gentle way to grow to be a responsible adult who cares about others and understands himself or herself. It is a wonderful blessing we have when we finally have a grandchild and we can, play, read and teach values gently to that child. Perhaps next month, we will discuss more of the excitement of being a new grandmother, or grandfather. 
October 2020
Ideas for conversations and actions with grandchildren around theme of Halloween
This Halloween is going to be different from others because of social distancing. What can we do this year that will be fun and meaningful to ourselves and others. What can we collect and to whom will we give them? perhaps all the pennies in the whole house for the next two weeks. our outgrown winter clothes, Now is the time when people might have to have gloves and warm coats}, books we dont read anymore, toys we don’t play with anymore, stuffed animals we no longer want there are children in shelters at this time who would love them. What can we read? Books that teach how you can make the world a happier place- BE KIND - can you name one? What can we write and to whom?— perhaps to a newspaper to suggest something important, to a relative, to a neighbor, to a friend or who else. Compliment everyone you see today. Buy some Halloween candy for a neighbor or friend who can’t go trick or treating this year. Buy some rocks, paint a kind message on them or just write messages on note paper and drop them off at friends or neighbors or send to a teacher or a grandparent. 
December 2020
Dear friends, I hope you had a wonderful Chanukah, and that you have a great New Year, and I hope next year we will all be able to celebrate with our families.
This year, I sent each of my children and my grandchildren a monetary gift for Chanukah. If you like this idea, you can use it for birthdays or any holiday, or special time. I want to remind them that even if I dont see them, I still want them to remember to be philanthropists, and to be aware of others in this world. This is a copy of the letter that each one received in the mail with a check. Dear ……….., Dec. 2020 Happy Chanukah to you. I hope that you will be having lots of fun during the holidays, and that life is good to you. I am enclosing a Chanukah gift for you, but because I know you are a philanthropist, I ask the following of you. As a reminder, a philanthropist donates time, money and voice.
I love you and hope your holidays are REALLY good. Bubba. |
